Mom always said….

Hind sight is 20/20.  Oh, the irony.  Things that you take for granted when you are younger become oh so clear after you have kids of your own.  Like your mother is always right…that’s something I now know to be true…I not only value her advice, but I actively seek it out for pretty much everything.  Twenty years ago you could talk until you were blue in the face and I still wouldn’t be convinced.  My preteen years were the hardest…the funny thing is I don’t remember much about them.  I remember being angry and annoyed a whole lot about nothing.  My mom could ask me if I wanted something for dinner and I would get mad and go to my room.  Why?  What was wrong with me?  I don’t know. I couldn’t tell you.  Hormones maybe?

She used to say that one of these days you will have kids of your own and you will see.  You’ll get paid back for everything you do.  She was right.  I love my kids.  They’re smart and they both have generous hearts.  But sometimes I feel like I preach all the time.  Wash your hands, brush your teeth, take your bath, wipe your feet…do you have homework?  do it.,  pick up your room, don’t fight with your sister, brush your hair, you can’t wear shorts to school…there’s snow outside.  You get my drift.

And I worry about everything.  Over the years those worries have changed just as my kids have changed.  When they were babies and couldn’t talk, I was concerned with their basic care and safety.  After they were more mobile I worried about their boo-boo’s and their happiness.  Now I worry about their peace of mind and their future.  Somewhere along the way I started to notice my brown hair was sprinkled with gray and developed a new appreciation for all of the gray hairs on my mothers head.  How many of those was I responsible for?    

My mom also says that you love your kids unconditionally, no matter what.  You never quit on them…always keep after them–it’s how they know you really care.  And even though they may see it as nagging now, when they get older they will realize it was because you cared.

She was right.

 

Hmmm….

I’ve been wondering why I Iaugh when I’m happy, but sometimes when I laugh…I cry.  And sometimes when I’m sad, I cry, but when I’m  overwhelmingly happy…I cry, too.

I wonder if the wires in my brain are possibly crossed.  People probably think I’m an emotional train wreck.  All in a day’s work I guess.

 

 

 

What’s love really all about…

I was a late bloomer.  My hormones didn’t kick in the same time as every one else’s.  When girls and boys were “dating”, I was at home baking brownies and playing cards with my family.  I was okay with that.  It all seemed very dramatic and complicated.  I didn’t even have my first kiss until I was almost seventeen.  And that innocent peck stirred up a whole myriad of confusion.  Don’t get me wrong.  I had crushes.  Boys I thought were cute that gave me butterflies in my stomach.  I even went as far to tell my best guy friend’s mother in third grade that I was going to marry her son.  But instead I married my high school sweetheart.  He was the one that changed everything.  I went from being shy and backward to just the opposite.  I aggressively pursued him.  It was like I knew he was just the right one and I couldn’t let him get away.  Of course, everyone thought we were crazy; way too young to be getting married.  We didn’t wait long to start our family.  We have two beautiful daughters, now thirteen  and ten.  We’ve been married fifteen years.  Wow.  Fifteen years.  I think back to when I was fifteen, just two years older than my eldest daughter, and it feels like an eternity. 

Being married is wonderfully worthwhile, but it doesn’t mean it’s always easy breezy.  I think you have to love yourself, love your spouse, and love your marriage and the life you build together.  Things change as time passes.  It is inevitable.  I look at myself in the mirror sometimes and find it hard to recognize the person I see.  My features are softer and my figure curvier, but I consider myself one of the lucky ones for having a husband who has grown with me and appreciates me exactly the way I am.  He laughs as I examine the gray starting to show in my hair because he is salt and pepper too.  We’ve shared sleepless nights worrying together, so we’ve earned them like a badge of honor.  The intricate roadmap on my stomach from pregnancy is never seen as anything other than the miracle of creating our family.  We accept each other’s imperfections and try not to sweat the small stuff.  We embrace our differences and try to laugh together as much as possible because it’s not all about flowers and romance.  It’s about not forgetting to pick up something from the store on your way home, taking turns rocking your sick child, and taking out the trash without being told five hundred times.  Living the fairy tale doesn’t mean that every day realities disappear.  It’s a precarious balance.   

I’ve been sentimental the last few weeks.  I’m so blessed to have found the right life partner.  My wish would be that everyone has an opportunity to find a special someone to walk through this journey that we call life.

 

A new blank page…

Here we are.  The first day of a new year.  It’s like a blank page staring at you, an untold story simply waiting for someone to put pen to paper.  Oh the possibilities!!  So far, there have been no mistakes, no regrets.  You haven’t stumbled or faltered.  It’s better than waking up to a new fallen snow before it’s been disturbed.  It’s pristine and flawless.  Take a deep breath and savor the moment.  Now is the time to ponder how you want the story to progress.  Where do you go from here?  No need for brash decisions.  Today is the day for endless possibilities;  process them, believe in them.  Save worry and regret for tomorrow.  Allow yourself one day to be open to the hope of getting it right.  We all deserve one day!   

 

A great opportunity…

For anyone interested in reading my book, for a limited time the Kindle version is on discount for 99 cents.  It would be a great time to check it out!!  Especially if you have it on your book shelf to read.  Download it now and read it when you have a chance.

http://www.amazon.com/Wings-Hope-B-Pethtel-ebook/dp/B00D4GD8EW/ref=sr_1_3_bnp_1_kin?ie=UTF8&qid=1388333051&sr=8-3&keywords=wings+of+hope

 

The best gift ever….

I must admit that I have been in a very depressed state the last month or so after I dropped my computer and lost so many memories.  No just photos, videos, and music.  I also lost all of my 2013 work documents and all of my progress on the second book I was writing.  I’ve really been beating myself up.  If I hadn’t let it slip off of the counter, if I had been more responsible, more diligent.  If only I had backed up my documents. 

The what if’s are endless.  I just kind of gave up and resigned myself to the fact that maybe bad things happen for a reason and I should just give in and give up.  All of this negative mojo made it very difficult to get in the holiday spirit.  But I received one of the most thoughtful gifts for Christmas.  While I have been moping around, my family snuck and had my computer fixed.  All of my documents are still gone, but the unwavering faith my family has in me is quite humbling.  They don’t want me to give up, they want me to keep writing.  Their love and support was enough to make me shape up and snap out of my doom and gloom mentality. 

So, I already know what my New Year’s resolution will be…to keep working and do everything in my power not to let them down.  Oh, and maybe not drop my computer again, like ever. 

 

A simple life…

Living in rural WV, there are a lot of things you can do without.  When you are born in the country you develop a vivid imagination and actually use it to entertain yourself or risk the possibility of dying from boredom.  I remember a couple of summers that every day my sister and I ran for hours in the woods pretending we were riding horses.  Mine was called Oreo and he was a dapple gray Clydesdale.  The ground would shake as I rode him. (Like I said, vivid imagination.)  We groomed them and fed them every night before we put them back in the barn.  One thing for sure, every night after we played horse we would sleep like a rock. 

We also wandered.  You could do that back then; wander away from your house without worrying that someone might try and take you.  Neighbors weren’t next door….they were three hollers over.  Our favorite place to wander was down the creek. We discovered a rocky bank and christened it “Rock Paradise” (so maybe we weren’t using our imagination when we came up with that name).    Sometimes we would ride our imaginary horses there and sometimes we would actually ride our bikes.  Somehow we were always wet or muddy at the end of the day and had to spray off with the water hose before Mom would even let us inside the house. 

Collecting critters was another past time.  We had turtles, squirrels, flying squirrels, groundhogs, cats, dogs, fish, chickens, goats, cows….anything we could catch.  I think my favorite was a black cat we named Tom.  He would go out hunting and we could hear him screeching from miles away on his way back home.  We would sit on the back steps and wait for him to make his way back and then shower him with love and affection.        

TV was reserved for Saturday morning cartoons.  We had the big tall antennae that you had to turn by hand for signal.  So someone had to be inside yelling at the person outside when the picture was clear enough to actually watch.  No matter how hard you tried, you could never get a clear picture like you do today.  There was always some static.  But we were happy to watch Mighty Mouse, The Road Runner, He-man, She-ra, and any other cartoons that would come in.  Then it was back outside to play some more. 

Mom was the dishwasher, the washing machine had to be filled up with buckets and the ringer would get your fingers if you weren’t careful,  the toilet was an outhouse, and we showered outside with a water hose up until late fall.  So, as I sit here and listen to my dishwasher running and the buzzer on my dryer I do count my blessings.  Some things are easier.  But I can’t help the sense of loss that some things were much better back then without all of the luxuries of today.     

 

Fall is coming…

I noticed that not only  are they changing colors, but the roads are also scattered with leaves.  Fall is almost upon us.

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am holding a free promotion for my book Wings of Hope.  You can download it on September 1st.   If you miss this opportunity, don’t sweat it.  I will hopefully be able to do another promotion sometime in October.

http://www.amazon.com/Wings-of-Hope-ebook/dp/B00D4GD8EW/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&sr=1-2&qid=1377982271

 

Tick Tock, tick tock…

Time.  As fleeting as a heartbeat or the blink of an eye.  When you want a moment to last, especially firsts–first date, first kiss, or later on in life…baby’s first words, first steps.  Time has no conscience and it can’t be stopped.  It is dependable and steady.  Even the times we wish away.  Embarrassing moments or classes that bore you.  Time will crawl; like a snail or the steady drip of a leaky faucet.     

Sitting in the Dr.’s office, waiting for dinner, standing in line to use the restroom at a concert….we wish time away.

Talking with friends, enjoying a visit with your grand kids, coffee with your sister…we dig our nails in and wring out every second until it has to end. 

So I wonder which is more fickle–time or human nature?

 

 

County Fair Time…

It’s that time of year again…the infamous county fair.  Although it may be small, there is no other that quite spells community.  You can’t pull in and exit your vehicle without seeing a friendly face, a smile, and a ‘how do you do?’.  You can enter a watermelon eating contest, a skillet throw, tractor pull or mud bog, or any number of talent/beauty contests.  There’s lively entertainment pretty much all day long that will keep you tapping your toes or swaying back and forth.  It’s impossible to ignore; almost contagious. 

There’s a livestock sale to benefit the FHA and 4-H members.  A smelly barn full of very vocal animals to tour and beautiful hand made quilts that will leave you in awe (these aren’t in the barn of course).  Lots of games to play if you’re willing to take a risk.  And don’t forget to take time to enjoy fresh cotton candy or funnel cakes.  It just wouldn’t be the complete experience without it.

Carnival rides for the kids amusement, a nice shady spot to cop a squat and rest, an opportunity to catch up with old friends or the possibility to make new ones.  It’s a wonderful week…fair time.  I hope everyone partakes.